How to reclaim your lost fearlessness. It’s time to be BOLD (again)

How to reclaim your lost fearlessness. It’s time to be BOLD (again)

FEARLESSNESS and the day I almost died.

The day I started hiding out and stopped being the real me was so very long ago, but then somedays it was just yesterday.

River, John and I watched that old movie Zootopia recently. 

Do you ever find lessons for your life or for your biz in the strangest places? Lessons from when you were a child? 

Do you remember when you lost your fearlessness? When you began to hide the real you? How old were you?Click To Tweet

And when did you get it back? Or are you still searching for her…that part of you hidden deep inside.

(first, super cute movie)

Anyhow, the lyrics to the theme song talk about TRY EVERYTHING….here’s the soundtrack

Go ahead, listen to it, it is catchy. Fun part of having child, you get to listen to all kinds of uplifting, inspirational songs.

The movie got me thinking about you.

About women.

It's time to be BOLD (again) Click To Tweet

I was wondering about the moments when we lost the feeling that we could try everything, fearlessly, like a child.

When did you lose it? Do you recall?

As a mama, maybe you relate, you support your children to do things, to take risks, to go for it, I mean remember when they took their first steps…. we didn’t stop them.

Talking to hundreds of women through the years, they for the most part, can remember when they lost their FEARLESSNESS.

They remember that exact moment when they lost their sense of being BOLD.

I remember the moment that I stopped being bold, the moment that I became fearful, the moment that my fearlessness retreated inside, buried for years, hidden, the moment I almost died…

I was about 9 years old and I was outside running wild.

I grew up in an apartment for 7 years so there wasn’t much to do except be outside. Anyway, I was a little daredevil. I would climb trees, skate on the semi-frozen pond in my sneakers, cross the street into the bad neighborhood, as a latch key kid from age 5 on, I did whatever the hell I wanted. (oh the 70’s, can’t even FATHOM leaving my daughter RIVER alone at age 5!!)

One particular day my mother was home sick from work. I remember coming inside excited to share my big adventure, and went into my mother’s bedroom

and there she was having a seizure.

I hadn’t seen this before. I didn’t understand what was happening. All I knew was that I couldn’t stop it.

Jim (my step-father) came home and my mom told him she had had another seizure…and he said to me….”what did you do to her?”

I, stunned said I didn’t do anything to her.

And he proceeded to tell me she has these seizures because I stress her out.

Apparently I was a child who would talk too much, run around too much, exhaust her from my “big” stories and some other stuff I have blanked out.

That was the beginning of me hiding who I was and what I wanted. That was the day I became afraid of being me. That was the day I almost died, almost allowed my fearlessness to die away.

Hiding that I had big dreams, to have a big fancy house like I imagined my Barbie having. (I used to create a whole entire life right in my very own living room for Barbie), I wanted to travel, go places, get away from where I was living, I wanted to have a prince charming…

That was the day I hid my dreams.

That was the day I almost died. That little spirit, almost vanished.

That was the day that cemented my co-dependency. I was always so worried about my mother and her frailty and her emotional state—and of course didn’t want to be the cause of any more seizures.

And that was the day I began hiding out behind other people, and eventually food, eventually drinking, eventually men….

until that hidden part of me HAD TO COME OUT. Had to resurface. Had to have life breathed back into it.

My fear of what others would think started to dim in comparison to my fear of what I might regret if I didn't finally show up in the world.Click To Tweet

Yeah, it took a long time to get over that screwed up mess! And sometimes I still realize I have still have a fleeting thought about what others think about me.

But what I realize is the mission to become alive and go for it and be fully visible, and to work with you being visible and doing the thing you came here to do….far outweighs  caring about what other people think of me.

No one has that kind of power over me anymore.

Power.

I was tired of giving away my power.

It’s time to be BOLD (again)

You know?

Having a vision of what was possible in the world was motivating, but not necessarily enough to make a single major change.

It was a process of small changes.

Small decisions that restored trust.

Building trust, leads to wanting to take more chances.

Supporting oneself, builds self-esteem and the confidence to go for it.

And then you get to the point where you say, f’it.

Today is the day I allow myself to stop the chatter, the mental chatter and bull that is holding me back.

Today is the day I am deciding to write my own story.

Decide on what that looks like.

And then create it.

Manifest it.

Make sh*t happen.

No more bull.

No more denial.

No more one day.

No more “things are fine”, when they aren’t.

Today is the day I decide to design the life I want and build a biz to support it. It was a process.

No, what I mean to say is it is still a daily process.

Daily.

It’s time to be BOLD (again)

Vigilant.

On top of it (most times).

That’s how much I wanted it.

That’s how much I think you want it, too.

Really this is all about being BOLD. (brave, outgoing, leader, decisive)

It is about having the courage to go for it try everything. Even if you may FAIL,

YOU gotta try. YOU gotta go for it.

You have this thing inside, ready to shine!

IT doesn’t matter if you fail!

IT only matters that you try and keep  trying until you get it right!!

I believe in you!!

Mary

It’s time to be BOLD (again)

BOLD LIFE & BIZ ACTION STEPS: using the Big, Breakthrough Formula™

1. Remember a moment when you started hiding out from the world, from people’s opinions. (condition) 

2. What have you been thinking about this? (thoughts)

3. How does this make you feel? (feelings)

4. How do you react or respond to these feelings? (behavior)

5. Now what? Do you like the outcome? (results)

What can you do today to recognize you are in charge of the feeling and the results?

Yes, how can you think about that situation differently?

You can change the results…today you can have back your fearlessness.

No longer do you have to hide yourself.

No longer do you have to stay stuck in the past event that made you shy away from being bold.

Want some more support around being BOLD, reawakening your fearlessness?

Let’s chat. I promise we can have a breakthrough in just a few minutes, here is my calendar link. 

#bebolditstime

I believe in you!

Mary

It’s time to be BOLD (again)

p.s. Here are the lyrics in case you want to sing along!!

[Intro] Oh oh oh oh oooh Oh oh oh oh oooh Oh oh oh oh oooh Oh oh oh oh oooh [Verse 1] I messed up tonight, I lost another fight I still mess up but I’ll just start again I keep falling down, I keep on hitting the ground I always get up now to see what’s next

[Pre-Chorus] Birds don’t just fly, they fall down and get up Nobody learns without getting it wrong [Chorus] I won’t give up, no I won’t give in Till I reach the end and then I’ll start again No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything I wanna try even though I could fail I won’t give up, no I won’t give in Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything I wanna try even though I could fail

Post-Chorus] Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh

[Verse 2] Look at how far you’ve come, you filled y`our heart with love Baby you’ve done enough, take a deep breath Don’t beat yourself up, don’t need to run so fast Sometimes we come last, but we did our best

[Chorus] I won’t give up, no I won’t give in Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything I wanna try even though I could fail I won’t give up, no I won’t give in Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything I wanna try even though I could fail

[Bridge] I’ll keep on making those new mistakes I’ll keep on making them every day

Those new mistakes [Outro] Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything Oh oh oh oh oooh Try everything