personal question: who controls your money?
Did you give it (your power) away?
Do you have to “ask” your husband for money?
Do you buy his Christmas presents with “his” money?
When you think about money, how do you feel within your body?
Do you work hard and then impulse buy as a reward?
How much do you owe?
How much do you make?
How much do you bring home?
How much is in savings? Investments?
How much money do you need to retire?
Do you talk yourself into not knowing how to manage your money because:
it is too complicated
he does it
I’m sure there is always money there (where is there?)
Buy things you don’t need?
Have clothing in the closet with tags on them?
Do you want more money?
A better lifestyle?
A bigger business?
How many hours do you need to work to live the kind of life you want?
How many clients do you need to close?
When was the last time you increased your prices?
Do you give away time for free?
Do you discount your rates?
Do you do it is because you like to HELP people?
Do you buy for your kids but not for you?
When was the last time you had a new outfit?
What messages did your mom give you about money?
Are you in debt? How does that feel?
Okay, damn, Mary what’s with all the money questions?
According to an article in Forbes, “Drumroll, please. Prudential’s eighth biennial study on the Financial Experience & Behaviors Among Women was unveiled yesterday and the news is this: Women feel no more prepared to make wise financial decisions today than they did two years ago — or even a decade ago.
How we do one thing is how we do it all.
Think about it.
You have a relationship with money.
How is the relationship you have with money compared to the relationships you have with loved ones? With clients? With friends?
Meaning, do you have boundaries around money?
Boundaries around your people relationships?
How intimate are you with your money (meaning can you answer those questions above) and how intimate are you with yourself, with your lover, with other people….
Intimate can also be thought of as AUTHENTIC.
Money is one of the first things women give up control around.
We are socialized to want the man to take care of it.
And then we recognize this, and feel shame about it.
Why is it we may be super together in business, can answer any question a client has, but can’t answer some of the questions above?
So much of what we do in life, our behaviors, are from how we are programmed. We have talked about LOVE ROLE MODELS before, now we need to look at our MONEY ROLE MODELS.
Our mindset around money can be altered just as our mindset about creating more success in life, having a rockin’ hot love affair, or our thought that “we just can’t lose that last ten pounds.”
Well, yes we can.
Yes, many women do.
The very first step is realizing we have all kinds of misguided ideas about what we are capable of because we fear failure in general and especially with money!
It is time for us to truly step up to the big girl seat and learn this whole “money thing”
Did you know, elderly women are among the poorest people in our Country, living below the poverty line?
Really, who wants to eat cat food when they are old.
You can make boat loads of money.
There is plenty for everyone so you don’t need to feel guilty.
You are cheating yourself (and perhaps your kids) our of abundance by not embracing money.
You can love money without loving it like a god.
You can love what money can do for you.
You can love that you can give money away.
Get real…..how can you help others if you are not having a fantastic relationship with money?
Stop talking yourself into thinking you are just fine with having just enough.
It is more than alright to want it all and have it all.
Think of how it would feel to be financially stable, wealthy, abundant….and be able to give to your favorite charity?
start a school?
donate to end female sex trafficking?
buy mittens, coats and boots for the homeless?
go spend the day at the spa?
celebrate the start of NEW BOOT SEASON!
enjoy a larger house so you can entertain the way you desire?
You can have more.
You can earn more.
You can be in control of your money.
Your Action Steps:
Start by being gentle with yourself for not wanting to know about your finances.
Then, grab a notebook and answer all of these questions.
Promise, when you answer these questions you will be on the road to riches!
Comment on how you want to be more in control of your money.
Go for the life and biz of your dreams!
I believe in you,
Not sure how your can get control of your money? Call me
Hmmmm… While I’ve been the only one handling my money for several years, I still have serious issues around it. From parents always in financial crisis followed by bohemian life of service and a man who controlled the money, and a few other things, the imprint is deep. I am light years ahead of all that today. Charging more than I “need” feels like taking advantage of others, like stealing. I think that’s the last deep, dirty nugget I have to deal with.
Charging more than you need? that makes me think about what you need…how much vs. how little.
How are you judging this for yourself?
I think I am going to do a post about this very topic…I think it will help you see things differently!!