Today is Saturday. I started the day truly wanting total time alone.
Day 3 of my Celebration.
Have you ever NEEDED that?
Maybe it is because I am an only child, maybe because by nature I am an introvert-whatever?
Maybe it is because I have been busy working, networking, expanding my business, working with my amazing clients-whatever?
It doesn’t really matter, whatever the reason-today I woke up really needing time to myself.
John, River and I always start our mornings reviewing the plans for the day. We had a few on the books, Easter Egg Hunt and a birthday party.
I planned on cooking a ham and puttering in the kitchen most of the day.
Then I realized, what I actually needed is time alone.
So the plans became–Easter Egg Hunt, John take River to the party and I am going to work out and then sit in front of the television, with the fire going (it is a chilly, rainy spring day) and catch up on watching BAREFOOT CONTESSA. And who knows, maybe fall asleep on the sofa for a nap.
Here is the point:
My celebration today is realizing I wanted to ask my family to honor my need for alone time.
I wasn’t trying to get their permission and I didn’t just want to tell them I was going to do it.
I actually just asked.
How often do you actually ASK for your needs to be met by those in your life?
How often to you just TELL someone what you are going to do?
How often do you feel the need to GET PERMISSION?
I had to examine this a little because frankly, I felt almost like telling them to leave me alone. Because asking for what I need is something I had to overcome in my life. I used to never ask out of fear I would be rejected. So I would just tell people what I was going to do.
Now for the getting permission part, just thinking about this posture in a love relationship makes me feel uneasy. When you have the need to seek getting permission I want you to analyze the balance of power in your relationship. “…would it be alright…?”
Okay, so off to work out, then CHILL by the fire!
Tomorrow will be the cooking and puttering in the kitchen day—
Ask for what you need. “I really need some time alone today, I would like to ask you both for some uninterrupted chill time.”
Examine the ideas of how these three things relate in your relationship. Asking vs. Getting Permission vs. Telling
To your extraordinary relationship with you-
